His Name Was PK

Over many years I've learned and experienced that kids really do say the darndest things! I easily fell into this category as a child and one person in particular got stuck with my saying for the rest of his life!

Byron Peddy

Known to 2 men as Dad

Known to 1 woman as husband and friend

Known to 2 kids as Grandpa

And known to one little girl as 'Her Pk'

Somewhere along the way in my growing up I managed to drop all normal and traditional names of Grandpa or Grandfather or Granddad and decided that Byron Peddy would now be called Ponkus.  It came from out of no where and often received confused faces and much laughter upon speaking it out loud. PK himself was floored at the randomness that came with his new name but no matter his thoughts or preference...the name had stuck. Over a little bit more time my little energetic and inventing heart burst out in calling him PK for short and that is where he has landed at in my heart since I can remember. Not everyone jumped on board or adopted his completely original new name but he always knew the little girl calling after him when PK was spoken. 

My PK passed away this morning at 3am. He went to be with Jesus and I mean really be with Jesus. He is drenched in love and glory and truth and peace like I can't even fathom right now. My PK was a hard and rough sort of man. He wasn't the emotional or opening up sort of type. I can still hear his groaning "whaaattt" as I called out his name as a child, but no matter how tough his reply was a simple jump-on-the-back hug and his chuckle was released. His heart was softened and his smile couldn't be denied. As a little girl, in my heart, he was just a big teddy bear that needed some extra squeezing from time to time and I believe that's just what I did.

But over the past week I have felt an extreme amount of emotions...you name it and I've had it. But the one that continues to lay heavy on my heart is conviction. I never told him. I never once told him how Jesus had touched and radically wrecked my life with His glory! Yes, he believed in Jesus and is now in Heaven but I missed it with him. I am filled with conviction because why is my Family the ones who I have shared the least with about my heart and the journey the Lord has taken it on? Why did I have to ask my dad a week ago to make sure he believed and knew Jesus...I SHOULD HAVE ALREADY KNOWN! It's the MOST IMPORTANT thing...it's the ONLY reason we are here on this earth and I should have known. 

How can my family truly know me if they do not know my heart and what Jesus has done for me and Jesus inside of me?

So I'm thankful for the time with him. I'm thankful that he is with Jesus right now and he gets to see it all, feel it all and know it all. I'm thankful that on May 5, 2012 he will be sitting with Jesus cheering me on as I walk down the aisle. I'm thankful he is in no pain. But I am sorry. I'm sorry that I never got to tell him. I'm sorry that I didn't know and waited until his last days to ask where he stood with the Lord. Father renew within me a steadfast and urgent spirit...

I love you PK

A new meaning of Family

My family is big, it's welcoming, it's a safe place to run and it's uniquely close.

I was raised not only by my parents but by my aunts & uncles and grandparents. I can honestly say I've never met an extended family that is as close as mine is. I love every part of the holiday gatherings, wacky games that are played, the laughter, the music and most definitely the hugs. I've always known that my family was pretty special but my eyes were opened this past Friday.

I just spent the last week (Spring Break) in Colorado with what has become my 'other' family. My church family and I took around 100 college students to Fort Collins, Colorado to worship and tell anyone and everyone about Jesus. They saw countless amount of people give their lives to Jesus and receive salvation. People from Wal-mart and Target and the mall were being healed of physical problems right before their eyes!! The Kingdom of Heaven had fallen on that city!! My week looked a little different...I experienced humility before the Lord as I worked in the 'faceless and nameless' jobs. I spent my week crunching numbers, watching the budget and cooking lunch and dinner for 130 people every day. I got to pour out all that I had into the college girls and watch them encounter the Lord. It was amazing and so hard at the same time. At the end of the week I flew from Denver to Arkansas to meet Wiley for a wedding.

For the last couple months I have been seriously missing my family and my best friends that moved to Dallas. I have had more homesick now than I ever had in college! Wiley knowing this got in contact with some of my family and had them write a quick note to me. I was greeted at the airport with a stack of papers with so much love that I literally could not stop crying. I was overwhelmed with the words that were written to me from cousins and parents and aunts and uncles. I was overwhelmed with the love that I felt for them. I was overwhelmed with how much I needed them and their love in my life. 

I was taken aback with how their simple words expressing their love for me could fill my heart to overflowing...

So I wanted to write...I wanted to say thank you. Thank you to Wiley for loving me so much and desiring to see my heart filled. Thank you to my INCREDIBLE family who has shown me this rare love, not just on last friday, but for the last 22 years. Thank you all for being a consistent rock and safe place for me even from 8 hours away. Thank you for all the faceless and nameless acts you have done for me over the years! Thank you for being a place of steadfast support...Thank You

What we have is rare, it's chaotic at times, it's sacrificial always and it's the only way I would have it. I couldn't pick a better group to have in my corner. I love you all!!