His Name Was PK

Over many years I've learned and experienced that kids really do say the darndest things! I easily fell into this category as a child and one person in particular got stuck with my saying for the rest of his life!

Byron Peddy

Known to 2 men as Dad

Known to 1 woman as husband and friend

Known to 2 kids as Grandpa

And known to one little girl as 'Her Pk'

Somewhere along the way in my growing up I managed to drop all normal and traditional names of Grandpa or Grandfather or Granddad and decided that Byron Peddy would now be called Ponkus.  It came from out of no where and often received confused faces and much laughter upon speaking it out loud. PK himself was floored at the randomness that came with his new name but no matter his thoughts or preference...the name had stuck. Over a little bit more time my little energetic and inventing heart burst out in calling him PK for short and that is where he has landed at in my heart since I can remember. Not everyone jumped on board or adopted his completely original new name but he always knew the little girl calling after him when PK was spoken. 

My PK passed away this morning at 3am. He went to be with Jesus and I mean really be with Jesus. He is drenched in love and glory and truth and peace like I can't even fathom right now. My PK was a hard and rough sort of man. He wasn't the emotional or opening up sort of type. I can still hear his groaning "whaaattt" as I called out his name as a child, but no matter how tough his reply was a simple jump-on-the-back hug and his chuckle was released. His heart was softened and his smile couldn't be denied. As a little girl, in my heart, he was just a big teddy bear that needed some extra squeezing from time to time and I believe that's just what I did.

But over the past week I have felt an extreme amount of emotions...you name it and I've had it. But the one that continues to lay heavy on my heart is conviction. I never told him. I never once told him how Jesus had touched and radically wrecked my life with His glory! Yes, he believed in Jesus and is now in Heaven but I missed it with him. I am filled with conviction because why is my Family the ones who I have shared the least with about my heart and the journey the Lord has taken it on? Why did I have to ask my dad a week ago to make sure he believed and knew Jesus...I SHOULD HAVE ALREADY KNOWN! It's the MOST IMPORTANT thing...it's the ONLY reason we are here on this earth and I should have known. 

How can my family truly know me if they do not know my heart and what Jesus has done for me and Jesus inside of me?

So I'm thankful for the time with him. I'm thankful that he is with Jesus right now and he gets to see it all, feel it all and know it all. I'm thankful that on May 5, 2012 he will be sitting with Jesus cheering me on as I walk down the aisle. I'm thankful he is in no pain. But I am sorry. I'm sorry that I never got to tell him. I'm sorry that I didn't know and waited until his last days to ask where he stood with the Lord. Father renew within me a steadfast and urgent spirit...

I love you PK